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Assert your way to Dating Success

If you’re one of those men who sit at the sidelines watching the chase, hesitantly waiting for the perfect opportunity to approach that one girl at the other end of the bar who is probably the one which all the guys around you zero in onto, and you’re wondering how’d that lucky guy achieve the impossible, then the fatal flaws which hound all single men has takes a fancy on you, at least for the moment: indecision, and a lack of assertiveness. The fact that you hesitated and that you are sulking right now is evidence for it. What can you do about it? Man up, for one thing.

You can’t hide what’s inside, so the first thing you have to deal with is your self-esteem. Don’t be intimidated by other men’s advantages over you, because the truth is, everyone, and everyone has a fair chance at getting the girl, as long as they play the cards in their hand right. It’s best to start within, but if you want first-hand experience, you can fake and practice assertiveness until you perfect it.

Think twice before you speak. Your words can uplift or betray you. And as is the case with all Freudian slips, your subconscious takes control whenever you utter a word without thinking about its consequences. If you are setting up a date with a woman, avoid at all costs the use of conditional and tentative words, as this exudes reluctance, or worse, incompetence. Be concise and decisive. Instead of saying “May I take you out on a date?” which is a self-defeating statement, say “Let’s go out on a date.” This one is more definitive, and lets the woman think and accept that you are willing to assume control of any situation.

Don’t dally, don’t pause. If you’re going to make a request, the rule of thumb is that the longer the pause, the more troublesome the request. The more troublesome the request, the more it’s going to bite you in the you-know-where. Pausing within a sentence is the worst form of hesitation, and you’re setting the girl up for more doubt, to your fatal disadvantage. If you are still accustomed to the wrong way of doing it, take note that this skill takes practice; think and believe that you can do it, and all the rest will automatically follow through. You’ll be surprised, and pleased with the turnout at the end.

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Assert your way to Dating Success

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